Life is Negotiation: Drop the Fear

February 13, 2019

Categories: Negotiation

Sometimes in my life, I shy away from negotiation. It makes me feel uncomfortable. I don’t like to make the other person feel bad. Sometimes I don’t even know what I want or what my position is.

Here’s the problem: When I shy away from negotiation, I don’t get my needs met. I’m less likely to get what I want.

Life is Negotiation

The truth is that life is negotiation. It happens all the time.

Talking about your responsibilities at work? Negotiation

Asking for a raise? Negotiation

Deciding how long to visit the in-laws? Negotiation

Getting your kids to go to bed at 8pm? Negotiation

Different Wants and Needs

Negotiation occurs every time you’re trying to work out a situation where 2 or more people have different wants and needs.

News Flash: This happens A LOT.

The reality is that no two people are exactly alike. We each have our own set of needs, wants, and desires. When we live in community with other people, our needs, wants, and desires don’t always line up with the needs, wants, and desires of other people. So, we have to work that out.

That’s all negotiation is.

Negotiation is Normal

Negotiation is a normal part of everyday life. It’s as normal as eating food, drinking water, going to work, and sleeping in your bed at night. It’s part of the normal rhythm of life.

Because negotiation happens so frequently, it’s good to get comfortable with it. It’s important to see negotiation as normal and not something to be afraid of. It’s essential to enter into negotiation fully, rather than back away in fear.


How do you view negotiation in your own life? Do you see it as something normal, or something to be feared or avoided? What is one next step you could take to think about negotiation as a normal part of everyday life?


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